


Evil is a Strong Word

by rox_fanfics



Category: Captain America (Movies), Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers Tower, BAMF Peter Parker, Bucky Barnes & Peter Parker Friendship, Bucky Barnes Has Issues, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes and the 21st Century, Canon Divergence - Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Gen, Good Friend Ned Leeds, Good Peter, HYDRA Trash Party, Hurt/Comfort, Hydra (Marvel), Hydra Peter Parker, Ned Leeds is a Good Bro, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter Parker Whump, Post-Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie), Protective Bucky Barnes, Protective Peter Parker
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-26
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:33:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25531411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rox_fanfics/pseuds/rox_fanfics
Summary: Peter Parker’s life was a strange thing, and almost nobody knew anything about it.Born to HYDRA agents Mary and Richard Parker, Peter was given to scientists at the age of three to be trained into the best HYDRA weapon possible.~aka the HYDRA Peter Parker AU no one asked for. Includes Bucky and Peter friendship and a lot of Peter being confused about what is right and what is wrong.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Peter Parker, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, Minor or Background Relationship(s)
Comments: 30
Kudos: 277





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I thought that I might as well try my hand at this trope. Slightly inspired by other fics I’ve read, but there’s too many to remember, tbh.

Peter Parker’s life was a strange thing, and almost nobody knew anything about it. 

Born to HYDRA agents Mary and Richard Parker, Peter was given to scientists at the age of three to be trained into the best HYDRA weapon possible. 

He was subjected to torture and extreme training methods that pushed him to the breaking point. When he was ten he was given a serum similar to the one the Winter Soldier had been given, except this one was meant to give him more agility and movement capabilities. 

Peter had trained with the Winter Soldier many times, and he was often referred to as the Winter Spider by the scientists who experimented on him. 

“Why do we need to train so hard?” Peter asked on his thirteenth birthday when he was training with the Soldier. 

“We are supposed to make the world a safer place,” The Soldier answered throwing a dagger towards Peter, which he dodged. 

“Spider, are you sleeping? That was sloppy,” Agent Rumlow yelled from the doorway. 

Peter tensed, “No, sir,”

“Don’t think that you’ll get special treatment because you’re turning thirteen. You and the Soldier have your first mission together tomorrow, and if you fail, a stray dagger will be the least of your worries,”

Peter and the Soldier nodded, both of them collecting their weapons and getting ready to spar. 

~

When the Soldier and the Spider went on their mission the next day, they were held up by someone who seemed to be protecting their target. 

The man they needed to take down was named Nick Fury, one of HYDRA’s biggest obstacles to peace. They were chased down by a man with a shield and blonde hair, the Soldier caught the man’s shield before it could hit Peter’s chest. 

Both of them knew that they needed to get back to base, but the Soldier was acting strange. He kept looking back in the direction of where the man had been and he kept his flesh hand on Peter’s arm as they found the agents who picked them up. 

“I take him on alone next time,” The Soldier said keeping an arm on Peter. 

“Why?”

“It’s not your problem, little Spider,” the Soldier said, the smallest hint of a smile on his face. 

“Shut up, both of you,” Rumlow hissed, shoving Peter into his room, which felt more like a cell most days. The only thing Peter liked about his room was the books. 

He would read until he couldn’t keep his eyes open anymore. Reading physics, biology, and chemistry textbooks until the dead of night. 

Whenever he met up with the Soldier to train, Peter would tell him about everything he had learned since they had last seen each other. 

Peter only saw the Soldier once every few years, and he always felt like he was seeing an older brother after years of being apart. Peter didn’t know why but the Soldier never seemed to age between visits, and he always seemed a little surprised at how much time had passed since he had last seen Peter. 

The Winter Spider stayed in his room for fourteen hours, thirty-two minutes, and three seconds before he was let out again. 

That time was relatively short compared to the great lengths Peter had been kept there before. 

Once, when he was eleven, he had refused to get rid of all witnesses, as one of his targets had a five-year-old daughter who had looked so terrified of Peter. 

Peter hadn’t understood why, HYDRA was bringing peace to the world, right? Everyone he killed had been terrible people who needed to die, and this little girl simply didn’t understand. 

Still, he hadn’t wanted to kill her. 

He had taken too long, the girl screamed, and Peter was left trying to get out of the house without being seen. 

That slip up had earned him two days, five hours, seventeen minutes, and forty-three seconds in his room without food or water. He had been taken out only to be tortured. 

This had included keeping him underwater long enough for him to nearly drown, beatings from the agents, and barely enough food for a regular person to survive, but Peter had a super metabolism. 

By the end of the week, he was starving, bruised, and fully aware of the fact that this was nothing compared to what would happen if he made the same mistake again. 

When Peter was brought out of his room, expecting another training session with the Soldier, only to be told that the Soldier had not returned after his last mission. 

The agents around him were calling the Soldier ‘traitor’ and ‘scum’, words Peter had never associated with the man he considered an older brother. 

“Where did he go-?”

“Listen, Spider, you aren’t allowed to talk about him again. He’s a traitor, and he abandoned us, so he abandoned you too,” Rumlow said, eyes cold and words harsh. 

Peter felt like ice had pierced his heart. 

The Soldier had been the closest thing to family he had felt in his whole life. Someone who looked out for him and someone who wanted him to be better. 

From then on, he was no longer Peter Parker. 

He was only the Winter Spider. 

~

One year later, the Spider had escaped HYDRA himself. When he was on a mission, he had seen a newspaper that said something about the Avengers, the people he was told he was supposed to take down eventually. 

When he looked at the paper, the Spider felt himself filling with confusion. 

HYDRA always told him that the Avengers were evil, they wanted to defeat HYDRA and stop the peace HYDRA wanted to bring to the world. 

What Peter read, though, was the complete opposite of what HYDRA had told him. 

**** **_The Avengers and their mission to take down HYDRA_ **

_ The Avengers, earth’s mightiest heroes, have been working tirelessly to bring an end to the old Nazi science division known as HYDRA. After the fiasco that was SHIELD’s collapse, the Avengers have been working to track down HYDRA bases and free all captives who are subject to the organization’s inhumane torture and experimentation. One example of this is the newest member of the team: Scarlet Witch, otherwise known as Wanda Maximoff. Formerly HYDRA, Wanda Maximoff had volunteered for HYDRA experimentation after the death of her parents- _

Peter stopped reading, feeling his head spinning. 

“Who’s your favourite?” Someone asked, making the Spider whip his head around. 

“What?”

“Who’s your favourite Avenger?” The boy asked. 

He was probably the Spider’s age, a little shorter with light brown skin, and a fair bit larger. 

“I don’t have one,” the Spider muttered, putting the paper back. The boy stared at the Spider like he was crazy. 

“Dude, are you serious? The Avengers are awesome, they’ve saved the world so many times, and Tony Stark is a genius. Come on, is it Black Widow?”

The Spider stiffened, “No, I don’t have a favourite,”

“You like them all equally, right,” the boy rolled his eyes, “Everyone says that, but we all love Tony Stark deep in our hearts,” he sighed dramatically, “I’m Ned, by the way, what’s your name?”

The Spider through for a moment before he answered, “I’m Peter,” 

“Nice to meet you Peter,” Ned smiled, looking more innocent than any person the Spider had ever seen before. 

“Why are the Avengers trying to take down HYDRA?” The Spider asked, seemingly out of nowhere. 

Ned raised an eyebrow, almost like he was surprised the Spider didn’t know, “HYDRA’s evil, dude. They kidnap people and experiment on them, and they’ve killed, like, thousands of people. The Avengers try their best to stop them, but it’s like a war, casualties are bound to happen. A lot of people get angry at the Avenger because they can’t save everyone, but I feel like that’s not fair,”

The Spider felt his heart stop. 

He had killed some of those people Ned was talking about, and he doubted that the boy would be as friendly to him if he knew who he really was. 

“Thank you, Ned,” The Spider said, nodding at the boy before briskly walking down the busy New York City street. 

‘ _ HYDRA’s evil, dude. They kidnap people and experiment on them, and they’ve killed, like, thousands of people, _ ’ 

The Spider found Ned’s words repeating in his head as he headed towards the alley of the building he was meant to find his target in. 

_ Evil _

That was the word Ned had used. Not ‘bad’, not ‘scary’, not ‘weird’. 

He said they were evil. 

Growing up, The Spider had always heard SHIELD and the Avengers being referred to in that way, it was a strong word that was only used for the worst people. 

Ned, a regular boy who was Peter’s age, had used it for HYDRA. 

Instead of going to end the life of the man he had been assigned to, the Spider went to the nearest public library. 

Once inside, he found a computer and found every article he could that even mentioned HYDRA or the Avengers. 

As he read on, the Spider was horrified by his findings. 

HYDRA had been on the Nazi’s side during World War Two. HYDRA had used captured soldiers as test subjects. 

_ HYDRA had tortured him and the Soldier _ . 

Feeling like he was going to throw up, the Spider erased the search history of the computer and left with his hood up, hoping to go unnoticed. 

He decided then and there that he wasn’t going to be a part of something like that. 

He wasn’t sure who he was. If he was Peter Parker or the Winter Spider, but he knew one thing. 

HYDRA was evil, and he wasn’t. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really tired and school starts tomorrow :(

Finding a way to survive outside of HYDRA’s radar was somewhat difficult, but Peter knew how they tracked people, so he knew the main ways to avoid them. 

The first thing he did was create a fake person to become, as well as a fake guardian. 

He created a boy named Peter Fitzpatrick, and May Fitzpatrick, his ‘aunt’. Peter knew that, as a fourteen-year-old, he wouldn’t be able to enroll in a school or go anywhere without a guardian. 

Using the money HYDRA had given him for his mission (he knew that HYDRA could care less about their money) Peter found the cheapest studio apartment available in Manhattan, even though it wasn’t in the safest area. 

The landlord couldn’t care less about who lived in the place, so Peter didn’t have to worry about him figuring out that May Fitzpatrick was fake. He just had to make sure he paid the bills, and that was it.

Peter knew that he probably didn’t need to go to school, considering he was just as smart as most of the HYDRA scientists, but he knew that getting a job or doing what he needed to do would be nearly impossible without a high school diploma. 

He found a laptop in a dumpster and fixed it up, grinning when he got the damn thing to start. It wasn’t that hard to do, but he liked doing things without being told to. 

Peter found a school called Midtown School of Science and Technology and he decided that it was probably his best bet if he ever wanted to learn anything new. 

So, two weeks later, Peter found himself standing outside the school, a cheap backpack slung over his shoulder. 

It was weird getting used to being on his own. Usually, handlers would tell him what to do, where to be, and who to kill, but Peter didn’t have any of that anymore. 

As he made his way to the office to check-in, like the email had told him to, someone roughly shoved his shoulder with enough force that it would have sent a normal man to the ground. 

Peter whipped around to see the boy before him. 

He was shorter than Peter, and had darker skin, but his face was arrogant and hubris clouded his eyes. 

“Hey, new kid! Where’d you find those clothes, the dumpster?” He jeered, but Peter didn’t respond, letting the insult roll off of him like water off a duck’s back. He was used to far worse from his handlers, and this boy could be easily disposed of. 

Turning on his heel, Peter continued towards the office, trying his best to avoid any more confrontation. 

“Peter?”

He turned so fast that many of the students in the hallway stared at him with strange looks. 

“Ned?”

“Yeah, man!” Ned smiled, punching Peter in the arm, then wincing like it hurt him. 

Peter hadn’t felt anything. 

“I didn’t know you were going to Midtown,”

“I wasn’t until a few days ago, scholarship opened up,” Peter easily lied to this excitable boy, feeling just a little thankful that he had been trained so well. 

“You probably need to find the office, I’ll take you,” Ned offered grinning. 

For some reason, Peter found himself smiling too. 

“Sure, Ned,”

They both walked to the office, Ned bidding him goodbye as Peter pushed the door open and the morning bell rang. 

“Peter Fitzpatrick,” the secretary muttered, clicking away on her computer until the printer behind her started whirring, making Peter jump at the sudden noise. 

“Here’s your schedule, ask a friend to show you where the classrooms are,” she said, obviously not interested in Peter in the slightest. 

Still, Peter thanked her, something HYDRA had taught him to do with everyone to avoid suspicion, and also something he was forced to say to his handlers. 

After every training session, every brutal recalibration, Peter was meant to thank his handlers. 

He didn’t want to do that anymore. 

Finding the classroom was easy, especially considering that he had been able to get into some of the most secure buildings in the world to eliminate his targets at the age of twelve. 

Navigating a school was a walk in the park. 

As he went through the day, Peter realized that he had overestimated the school’s curriculum, meaning that most of the classes were subjects he had studied since he was a child. 

Even though it was boring and dull, Peter didn’t dare let himself rest or sleep in front of a teacher. 

He didn’t know the rules that applied here. Maybe they would hit him, or try to drown him, or tie him down to a table and beat him-

“Are you ok man?” Ned whispered, leaning over to get closer to Peter. 

Peter almost broke Ned’s neck in shock, but he quickly regained his composure. 

“Ned, Peter, please stop talking during my class,” the teacher (a lady with pale skin and slightly graying hair) snapped. 

He felt himself sitting completely still, not daring to disobey the authority figure here for fear of punishment. 

To his surprise, the teacher just continued her lesson like nothing had happened. 

There was about five minutes until the bell rang when the teacher addressed the class again. 

“As you know, Midtown Tech had field trips at the beginning of each year, and at the end of each year. Our beginning of the year field trip will take place two weeks from now, and all parents have been given an online permission slip to sign. Make sure that happens, and we will tell you more about the trip in the following lessons,”

The bell rang and everyone scrambled out of the classroom, Peter falling behind a little. 

“Dude, this field trip better be worth it. We went to Hammer Tech last year, it fucking sucked!” Ned had caught up to Peter, though he couldn’t understand why the boy wanted to be around him. 

“Do you want me to kill whoever planned it?” He asked, feeling like it would be polite to offer. He did, after all, have the skills. 

Ned laughed for some reason, “Nah, man. Mr. Harrington is a bit of a dumbass but he’s chill,”

“Ok,” Peter felt strange, he’d never had someone tell him not to kill before. 

Living a regular life would be harder than Peter thought.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't eaten anything today and I'm bored as hell. Here's a chapter.

The homework assigned by the school was much easier than Peter had anticipated, and he got it done quickly. The laptop he had been using was old, but it worked fine. 

There wasn’t much he could do about his living situation, but he could spend his free time educating himself on what HYDRA hadn’t taught him. 

Finding a library near his apartment, Peter walked into the history section, finding more books there than he had ever seen in his cell at HYDRA. They had given him books before, and he cherished them, but this was like a whole new world. 

He picked out a book on American history from the 1900s onwards. It seemed like the most logical place to start as the year was currently 2016, according to his computer and all the calendars he had seen so far. 

“I’ve never seen someone my age here before, but the universe works in strange ways,” someone spoke next to Peter, making his whip around to find a girl with light brown skin and unruly black hair. 

She wasn’t a physical threat, as far as Peter could tell, but she had a look about her that made it very obvious that she would be a challenging metal opponent for most people. 

“I’ve got some catching up to do,” Peter offered as an excuse, making the girl raise an unimpressed eyebrow. 

“That’s a book on American history from the 1900s, which most people learn in school. America is very patriotic that way. Unless you were homeschooled, which in that case, I assume you don’t have many friends, and I can’t help you there,” 

The girl sat down next to Peter pulling out a textbook that Peter recognized. 

“I was homeschooled until recently, actually,” he said, deciding that HYDRA was basically a torturous home school, “Do you go to Midtown tech? I recognize the textbook,” he said quickly, he didn’t want her to think that he was tailing her for no reason. 

Thinking that someone is tailing you isn’t a nice feeling, especially when you find out that it’s not actually happening. Peter is usually able to shake anyone who tries to tail him, but there have been times (mostly at the beginning of his training) when he’d accidentally led someone back to the base. 

The punishments were enough to make him much more vigilant next time. 

“Yeah, I saw you in class today. Peter, right?” She asked. Peter nodded, “I’m Michelle,” she offered, turning back to her textbook and paper, obviously ending the conversation. 

Peter discovered over the next two days that Michelle and Ned were good company, at least better than his handlers had been. They never hit him, never yelled at him, and let him do whatever he wanted in their presence. As far as Peter was concerned, that was good enough. 

Ned liked to talk a lot, often taking up their lunch break with excitement over something Peter knew nothing about, but always looked it up once he got out of school. It was worth it when he would bring it up the next day and he saw Ned’s face light up with the knowledge that Peter had been listening to him. 

Michelle was quiet, often meeting up with him at the library after school and doing her homework in silence. They talked sometimes, but their friendship didn’t depend on conversation and instead thrived off helping the other when help was requested. 

After one week at Michtown Tech, Peter had become used to the routine of the school. 

His days stayed the same most of the time, waking up at 5 am to go for a jog to get his energy out. After that, he got breakfast at the coffee shop down the street. Getting to school was easy, and Peter enjoyed the long stroll, giving him a chance to stretch his legs even more and time to clear his mind. 

School’s schedule hardly ever changed, and the time that Peter had after school hardly varied either. He would walk with Michelle and Ned to the library, Ned coming in to study with them more often than not, and they would complete their homework together. 

That routine took a turn when Peter’s Physics teacher announced the school’s field trip for the semester. 

“We’re going to Stark Industries!” He announced, sounding excited. 

Most of the class, including Ned, whispered excitedly to one another. Peter was a little less excited. Tony Stark had been brought up by his handlers often, mostly to call him names or tell Peter about how he stood between HYDRA and their mission. 

There was a small part of his brain that didn’t want to go anywhere where he could run into Stark, knowing that his mind was still conditioned to hate him. 

“Isn’t this so exciting! Even if we don’t get to see Tony Stark, even getting to look at the labs would be awesome!” Ned rumbled on about the subject for the next few minutes until the teacher called for silence again. 

“I might not be able to make it, I have a doctor’s appointment on the day,” Peter lied easily, making Ned look upset. 

Seeing his first friend upset over Peter’s lie made his gut clench for some reason. It was almost like the feeling he would get when he would see the Soldier and realize that the older man barely remembered him. 

“I can probably get it changed, though,” he backtracked, feeling instantly better when Ned’s face went back to the energized smile it had on before. 

Having friends was strange, but Peter decided that he liked it. He occasionally hoped that he could bond with someone like he had bonded with the Soldier before, but the thought felt strange. Peter daunted that he would ever be able to replace the Soldier, but maybe he didn’t need to. 

Maybe he would be alright on his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My survival depends on comments and kudos. I crave validation because I never got enough as a child so please let me experience the serotonin

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Please leave a kudos and/or comment :)
> 
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